After studying and researching for years, psychologists have identified four aspects of life that impact your happiness, and the sense of fulfillment in life.
Your relationship with yourself
The first is your relationship with yourself. Everyone else in your life is there to play a role in making you feel loved and emotionally supported. But at the end of the day, it's just your story. All of your happiness and your relationships stem from your relationship with yourself.
For example, if you're always second guessing your own decisions, then you make it easier for others to not take your choices seriously. When you are not confident in your own choices, why would anyone else be? And that's just one example of how your relationship with yourself impacts all other dimensions of your life. Understanding who you are, and how you came to be this person will nurture this relationship with yourself.
Meaningful relationships
A baby needs a mother, not just for food but to be held and comforted. You need a partner not just for sex, but also for emotional belongingness; friendships not just for fun times, but also to feel wanted and accepted.
But the key difference is that it's not just relationships, it's meaningful relationships. When you have people around you, and you still feel lonely, it's hard not to internalize that, and that damages your self concepts.
You're dependent on others to build these meaningful relationships, yet you can't control others.
So it becomes important to pay attention to how you are nurturing those relationships - how are you being vulnerable with one another because that's what makes you feel connected; makes relationships meaningful and fulfilling.
Following your passion
Living a full life means having a purpose - being driven by something. The need for accomplishment is even identified as one of the core personality traits. Now the trickiest part becomes that we define this purpose and passion just in the sense of career or our professional life, and that makes sense.
I identify with that. I'm an extremely ambitious person, but I also recognize that not everyone's passion is in their professional life. Your passion could be a hobby, your passion could be your family, your passion could be caring for others - to find the existential meaning to your life.
The reality that most of us run away from is that life is a journey with an undefined path and an undetermined goal. You define the meaning of the life that you are living. And you define this meaning over and over again as you go through different chapters of life, and in doing so, you choose a path for yourself - you choose what brings you joy.
