Getting angry when someone doesn't agree with you? Do THIS!
Words or actions taken when you're angry can destroy even the best of relationships. And even if you hide your anger, there is still the cost of feeling drained from feeling and managing such negative emotions within you.
This is why it's so important to understand the source of your anger, and how to best manage it. If you get angry every time someone tells you something that you don't want to hear then it's not a reaction to that specific person, and it's not about any particular things that you're sensitive about.
It has more to do with your defenses going up, when you are called out. And something important to recognize here is that anger is a secondary emotion, meaning that there's something else underneath that anger you go into this self-protective mode - as if you need to defend yourself. It immediately becomes you vs. the other person.
It's likely that you felt you needed to protect yourself at some point in your life, maybe in your childhood or perhaps in an unhealthy relationship.
For example, I was once working with a woman who had just got out of a 5 year long, emotionally abusive relationship. In her relationship, she was never taken seriously and her opinions were mostly ignored. And even though she was out of that relationship now, she still had a fear that others won't respect her or her thoughts. And this fear caused her to always be on edge. The smallest disagreements would trigger her into this self-protective mode.
The fact that your anger and the need to protect yourself still gets triggered means that you have not yet fully healed from it. I would recommend reflective journaling to start exploring those phases of your life. Maybe seek professional counseling to process them deeply, so you can feel more at peace with them and change how those experiences continue to impact your life now.
Also, it's going to be a process and it's going to take some time, so be sure to be patient with yourself. After all, your emotional brain is trying to protect you. And remember to be kind towards others in your life as well. especially if you know deep within that you're surrounded by people who care about you.
Even if holding your anger back is difficult for now, you can always practice vulnerability in your relationships. Be honest about your struggles, and the work you're doing to heal.
The one that angers you, controls you!
Now whether it's about being vulnerable or not feeling that you have to defend yourself, all of it will be impacted by your past experiences, especially if you have been through some toxic friendships. The pain and hurt can deeply impact your subconscious mind. It affects how you're able to trust others, and more importantly how much do you let yourself deeply bond with other people.
Which is why, it's essential to help your emotions heal from toxic friendships, which is exactly what this video is about.